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In this episode, we discuss:

An Alpha Female is a powerful and assertive woman. Her confidence is due to being an intelligent and intellectual problem-solver. Being an Alpha Female is a State of Mind based on choosing ambition and being proud of it. She strives for a happy and healthy work/life harmony. Robyn Baldwin interviews other Alpha Females to find out their tips & tricks to fit in fitness, health & nutrition habits into their daily lives, decrease stress and wind down at night and what makes them happy so they can take care of themselves and those around them.

• What is an Alpha Female?
• What confidence looks like for me
• What I am most passionate about
• The physical and energetic side of healing
• What work-life harmony looks like for me
• Nourishing myself through food, meditation, and nature
• Why we consciously stopped using the word ‘woo’
• My definition of happiness

Additional Resources:

COURSE: The Lightworker’s Library

Over 40 activations to help the lightworker who wants to use their story with chronic illness to inspire others and activate their life’s purpose. These activations help you to rewire your beliefs around self-worth, money, fear, time, confidence, and more.

PRODUCT: ClearStem

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BOOK: 21 Days of Healing

21 Days of Healing was created out of my own desire to go beyond food and heal on a deeper emotional and spiritual level. I curated the most-loved content based on hundreds of live student’s experience in the course and created this self-guided workbook to help you navigate chronic illness, release emotional inflammation, and find the medicine woman within.

Episode Transcript:

Welcome to the Healing Uncensored Podcast. My name is Sarah Small, and I’m a health and mindset coach for women with autoimmune disease. Just like you. I absolutely love helping you tap into yourself, feeling power, uncover the energetic side of healing, and release limiting beliefs around your body and your life. I think that this podcast is everything you wouldn’t hear at your doctor’s office. It’s a place for empowered souls to move beyond food, and heal themselves on a soul level. I hope you enjoy today’s episode. Now, let’s begin.

[musical interlude]

Sarah: Hello everyone. In today’s episode, you’re going to hear me chat with Robyn Baldwin. She is the creator of the Alpha Female podcast. She’s also an author, blogger, healthcare advocate, and essential oil educator. I had the honor of being interviewed by Robyn on, what it means to be an alpha female, work-life harmony, balancing masculine and feminine energy, and how we are both releasing the word, ‘woo’ from our vocabulary. And in this episode, we both share parts of our own healing journeys with autoimmune disease. I think being a Type A personality has made me an alpha female. Someone who is strong, highly motivated, and competent, but who also tends to fall into this perfectionist trap. This is something I’ve been working on releasing, for years. And the more I try to force things into perfect boxes, the more chaos I experience. So, I’ve been slowly letting my boxes evolve into their own unique shapes, and releasing the need to control every damn thing in my life. And I’ll tell you it’s liberating as fuck. So, I highly recommend letting your hair down, whipping it back and forth, letting your freak flag fly a little bit, as you listened to this episode today, and in your own life. So, let’s dive into this episode.

What is an Alpha Female?

Robyn: I’m so excited to get you on. The minute I found you on Instagram, I knew you were an alpha female. So, when I sent you over the definition, what did you think of it, and how do you see yourself as one?

Sarah: Wonderful. Yeah, so I saw a few words in your definition, which was beautifully written that really stuck out to me. And the first one that really stuck out was, just this embodiment of confidence. And I think there are so many things in our world, our universe, our society that are telling us not to be confident or wear down on our confidence. And I think as an alpha female, I try to embody this confidence, to empower other women, to see that it’s okay to shine your light. It’s okay to be freaking awesome. And you don’t have to play small, because of what you see, or what other people are telling you. So, I love that you have this confidence inside this alpha female definition. Another word that stuck out to me is authentic. And, yes, yes, yes, yes. I’m all about authenticity, and being real, and uncensored, and just raw. And I think that, as an alpha female, and in my community and what I do with my business Autoimmune Tribe is to try to be really freaking authentic. To show up and have conversations like we’re having them, best friends sitting on a bed together, versus some of the dry more vanilla stuff.

So, I love authenticity. And then the other thing that just really stood out to me in your definition of an alpha female is, staying true to your mission. And I think that when I have found my soul’s purpose, and I think when you find your soul’s purpose, sticking to that purpose without a doubt. Nothing is going to stop you. Nothing is going to stand in your way is just really empowering and powerful. And that’s something I really relate to. There’s nothing stopping me now, as far as my mission and what I want to do in this world.

What confidence looks like for me

Robyn: So, there’s a nugget I want to dig into. When you say you love confidence, you love authenticity, do you think the more raw, and real, and every time you try that on for size, that develops your confidence? Or what does confidence look like for you?

Sarah: Such a good question. Yes, it’s something I developed over time, and trial and error, and experiments, I think. Because I don’t think I was ever a naturally confident little girl. I had these big buck teeth, that stuck out of my mouth. Then I had my jaw wired shut for two months when I was 16 years old. And I had to talk like this. And so, I do think that showing up and being authentic time, after time, after time, does help in your confidence. And I can remember just two short years ago, being scared as hell, but starting my AutoimmuneTribe Instagram account and being, oh my god, what is everyone? What is the world going to think about this? I am going to approach healing chronic illness from a totally different perspective. What’s the feedback going to be? And I just kept showing up, and being real, and being raw. And the people who resonate with me, found me. And now, I get these amazing testimonials, and people reach out, I get DMs on Instagram all the time. And that has helped me build my confidence, but it definitely took that first step. And, I do think you can practice. Practice confidence, for sure.

Robyn: Yes. It’s all those little steps. And every time you get a great response, a great DM, and you see that it is actually creating a beautiful connection with people, then you’re, Oh, I got this. I think people are scared because when you’re real and raw, and vulnerable, you’re scared of what people are actually going to think. But every time you get the great responses… Like I was blessed with not having a ton of haters when I first started my online personal brand. And so, I just developed a ton of confidence. If I had been hit with haters from the start, I think it would have been different in terms of building that kind of confidence level.

Sarah: Yes, I totally agree. I think the energy you put out into the world too. Maybe you started that brand in a way that was, you weren’t attracting the haters and the trolls. I find that when my energy and my self-confidence starts to lower, then I attract people into my life, that are also going to question me, and question my credentials, and my expertise. But, if I show up, and I’m no, this is my truth. This is my authenticity. This is what I believe in, my opinion, even if it’s polar and not agreeable for everybody. That’s attractive to the people who are going to connect with you. And yes, shout out to all the people who take the time to send each of us DMs, or personal messages, or emails. Because that, it means the world. I don’t think it’s the only thing that is the pillar of self-confidence. But it definitely feels really good to know that you’re making a difference.

Robyn: I absolutely love that. And, the fact that you said energy, like when you have a certain energy, and you put something into the world. You usually attract exactly what you’re putting out. I remember when I was diagnosed with M.S. I had a mixture of, I’m going to take care of myself, I’m going to heal my body. And so, I would attract that type of energy back, with people saying, you’ve got this. You’re the strongest person I know. If anything, you’ll figure this out. To the people, I know this is going to be hard, how can I help you? Do you need help grocery shopping? That was the responses I need. But, in the back of my head, I was terrified of what my future would look like. And so, I would get that back from 50% of my audience. Like, Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. It’s the most horrible thing that’s ever happened. So now, I know exactly how to show up when I tell people, and if I’m projecting happiness, positivity, they match me. So, that’s pretty interesting when you brought that up.

Sarah: Yes, that’s so true. The energy put out into the world, that’s what you attract back. And I think with illness, both being women with autoimmune disease, chronic illness, you don’t always want the Oh, I’m so sorry for you pity party. Sometimes it feels good to be cared for, and comforted for, by my family, my friends, my partner. But, from the general public, I don’t want to be pitied. And so, it’s part of my life, but it doesn’t define me. And that sounds like you have the same perspective too. Where it’s, yes, I have this diagnosis, but it’s not going to define who I am, or how I show up in the world.

Robyn: Yes. When I tell people now, I always say, first, I’m going to tell you something, and I don’t want the words, I’m sorry to come into your mouth first.

Sarah: Please. Please don’t say that.

Robyn: So, I just know exactly what I want, when I tell people. But I was shocked that, that was my reaction. I was so angry when I got that. Because I just assumed it was pity. And people are, no, people are just being polite. I’m like, but I don’t want to polite. Polite doesn’t interest me in this world. So yes, there’s a difference between nice and polite. And polite is just, usually, people respond, based on the societal norms.

Sarah: Right. They don’t know what else to say. And they would probably have no idea what, having M.S., as an example for you, what does that look like? What does that feel like in your body? And so, for me, I’d rather someone maybe, just out to anyone listening, if you know, someone with a chronic illness. I would rather have someone ask me about what is it like to have celiac disease, or fibromyalgia, vitiligo, some of the things I struggle with, than, I’m sorry. Just open up the conversation, let it be real, raw, authentic.

What I am most passionate about

Robyn: Awesome. So, let’s get into, you have a mission in life. You’ve kind of sort of started to allude to it. So, tell us, what are you most passionate about?

Sarah: I am obsessed and insanely passionate about my brand, Autoimmune Tribe and more specifically, healing chronic illness on an energetic and emotional level. I still believe in physical healing and functional medicine, and all the amazing things that our medical system has created. But I am super passionate about marrying the physical that you hear from your doctor’s office, or your different practitioners you may see, with the energetic and emotional, and even spiritual side of healing. So, starting to incorporate all of these additional tools into your healing toolbox, as women with maybe chronic illness, maybe autoimmune disease, maybe you just have chronic stress. And not just looking at the physical symptoms, but also what past experiences, traumas, just even, it could be the smallest thing that you might still be carrying with you. Starting to see how that actually ties into your symptoms. But again, maybe physical, maybe emotional, and starting to heal on a deeper, more holistic level in your entire energy body. I could talk about energetic healing, emotional healing for hours, and hours, and hours, and days, and days, and days. But that is really what lights me up in this world.

Robyn: I love it. So, have you always been in business for yourself, or has it been an obvious evolution from your diagnosis and healing journey?

Sarah: So, my chronic illness as an adult, when I finally looked back and reflected, it began in seventh grade when I was diagnosed with stomach migraines. And had lots of details that, there’s not enough time to go into today to where I am today. But, my first autoimmune diagnosis was in my early twenties. And that was when I was in graduate school. And I was pursuing this career, a Master’s degree in international public service and trying to figure out where I fit into the world. And then, all this stuff just happened. All these different health issues and complications. And, I decided to stick with the job I was in, food and agriculture research, sustainable agriculture, up until my brother passed away. And, he committed suicide well, almost three years ago now. And that was really the moment where I said, okay, I had done this health coaching certification. I had learned so much about healing myself, because of my diagnoses that, something cracked open inside of me at that point and said, this is not just my journey to keep to myself. I want to share the experience I’ve been through. I want to share all these tools that I’ve been gathering, and gleaning, and using to help heal myself. And so, at that point I left my full-time job at that non-profit organization. And decided that I was going to create the life of my dreams and create freedom, and abundance, and start to align with my soul’s purpose. Instead of working my ass off for very little money and not feeling appreciated. And so, yes, losing Jordan, my brother was one of those moments that just, everything in your life comes to the forefront. And you start to ask yourself what is important, what is not, what can I shed away, and what can I make more room for? And part of what I made more room for was, being an entrepreneur, starting my own business. And then, also, just loving and taking care of myself.

The physical and energetic side of healing

Robyn: Now, what part of your journey? Because I’m assuming you started from a functional standpoint, of how can I nourish my body differently? Am I getting the right amount of sleep? All the physical things. What introduced you to the energetic part of your healing?

Sarah: I definitely started on the physical side, and I did the autoimmune paleo protocol diet. And I felt like I hit this plateau. So that was part of it. I’m hardly eating anything, and I’m eating all the quote, “right things” that the internet tells me to eat, but something still felt off in my body. So, I tapped into my intuition in order to find something deeper. My intuition was telling me this path you’re on is only going to take you so far. And it seems like it’s taken you as far as it’s going to go. So, I decided to do the research. I worked with an energy healer who does different types of healing, Reiki, intuitive healing, among other things. And she really opened up my eyes to just the expansiveness of what energy medicine looks like. I had a client who actually introduced me to the actual bioenergetic side of healing. And that’s something I’m also certified in, as a bioenergetic practitioner. So, my healing plateau has just forced me to look outside of the box at other solutions. But then again, bringing it back to my brother, I think he really served as my inspiration. Because once he passed, I felt more than ever strongly connected to my intuition, really wanting to connect with him, and his energy. And live a life that would make him proud. And part of my discovering that, was through bioenergetics.

Robyn: I love that. Thank you so much for sharing that story. And I think it’s interesting that what may have brought us to an autoimmune diagnosis. Alpha females tend to be, A Type overachievers. Which also serves us, and can serve us quite well, in terms of our healing journey. However, my support system around me has always been, you know you’re not broken, you know you don’t need to fix yourself? And I’m like, I know, but I’m optimizing the way that I live so that my body can be in, not a state of confusion. And, I feel you in terms of the plateau, because you do all the things and you’re okay, I’ve gotten to a point where I’m serving my body really well. And I’ve got my checklist of all the things I can do, but something still feels off. And it’s interesting when you’re, okay. Because I think I have a mix of audience listeners who, because I’m probably 50% woo, 50% science-based. So, it’s, okay, so I’ve done the autoimmune paleo protocol. It’s working really well for me, but I just have no energy. I have no mojo. So, I do the blood work. I check my supplements levels. I’m deficient, I get my vitamin and minerals back up. Okay, cool. But what else? And then, it’s random how energy workers can be placed in our life. Whether we find them on Instagram or, when I was living in Toronto a few years ago, I had a PR agency reach out to me. And they’re, “would you like a free Reiki session?” I was like, sure, why not? And you get exposed to it. And then, now, I’m seeking out emotional blueprint specialists, and trying to figure out how to heal that part of me. So, it’s fascinating that when we hit a plateau where it’s not about fixing what’s broken. But it’s, what have I not touched upon, because our bodies are so and I don’t want to use the word complicated, but it’s the first one that popped into my mind. But it’s complex. Like there are so many different aspects to how our bodies function. That our healing process is just as complex as as what potentially got us to the diagnosis in the first place.

Sarah: Oh my gosh. Yes, definitely. I think each person’s healing path journey, whatever you want to call it, is going to be so unique to them, and their bio-individuality. And I think we just have to listen, when we do hit that plateau and you feel like you’re doing everything right. Look outside the box. Even if it is woo. I just interviewed someone on my podcast this week and I told her, I said, it’s not woo, if it works. And if it works, it works. Do it. Go for it girl. Try the energy healing, try chanting, try yoga, try Reiki. And there’s no harm that can come in that, and that self-discovery. I think that if anything, maybe it doesn’t work for you, but you still discover something about yourself through that process.

What work-life harmony looks like for me

Robyn: Yes. That’s amazing. So now that you are in business for yourself, and you have total control of how you pick your priorities. What does work-life harmony look like for you, while also supporting your health?

Sarah: Honestly, it’s never perfect, and it’s always a little challenging. And this is something we agree upon. That there’s no perfect balance. So, what I do is, I try my best. And as an entrepreneur, and someone who is an alpha female, I love to go, grow, go. I am extremely driven and motivated to create and connect. And I’m also a constant learner. I love learning and reading. And so, there are only so many 24 hours in every day. And, we can’t fit it all in every single day. And so, what I do is even though I have this part of me that wants to go, go, go, and I love that part of me. I also know that I am sometimes forgetful on, where is my breaking point. And so, what I’ve adapted to and created in my life is, tapping into my intuition, and starting to just check in with myself more throughout the day. So, that I can take a second to stop clicking on my computer, my phone, and take a deep breath, and ask, where’s my energy level at right now? Honestly, how do I feel? Do I actually feel inspired to be creating this? Or do I think I’m supposed to be doing this? And, what that has allowed me to do is, and I have the luxury of to, being someone who works from home. Is, when I check in with myself and just do a little body scan, if I’m feeling depleted of energy or uninspired, I take a step back. And that step back has been so powerful. And, as someone who is extremely naturally in my masculine energy as a business owner, and human being, I have learned to honor more of the feminine, and even, I’m sure there’s, some of your listeners who are also entrepreneurs. And what I’ve learned is that, you don’t have to be constantly putting out information, and sales posts, and just push and be going, and going, and going, in order for people to find you, and for you to attract people into your life.

And I have to keep reminding myself of that. But there are days where I go with my boyfriend and we go up and snowboard in the mountains. Or I take a 2:00p.m. salt bath, because I can, and when I get out of the bath, or off the mountain and the slopes, three people have signed up for a program. Because I’m creating space for them to find me. I’m holding space for people to enter into my life. And so, just that constant checking in. I’ve fallen out of the habit, but I used to have, I think it’s called the Lotus bud app, or there’s Tibetan bell timers that’ll go off randomly throughout the day. And that was always my, okay, ding, ding, ding, Sarah are you being mindful right now? Or are you in your crazy work mode zone?

Robyn: So, I love how you intuitively knew I was going to ask you, what does stepping back look like? Because people come on and they answer high level, and I’m, no, I’m trying to get tips and tactics out of people, so that someone can be, Oh, stepping back and actually going for a walk. Oh, I get it stepping back. And I love that you have Epsom salt bath at 2:00 p.m. I had one on a Sunday at 10:00 a.m., and I felt so random. Because I was, this is my thing that I go to bed with. But it’s true, it’s when you have that space in your day, and you’re not running ragged, you also take your brain out of flight and fight mode. Which you can, especially when you’re in masculine energy, it just kind of lives there all the time.

Sarah: Right. And then you come back and you’re, okay, I’m a little bit more refreshed. And I can see whatever I was working on with new eyes. Salt baths are my life-saving tool. I almost take one every single night. And I am a woman who, I think partially because I am alpha female and super love my masculine structure creation. I struggle with a lot of anxiety. And it’s something that I again, does not define who I am, but I struggle with it. And I have for years. And it’s gotten so much better, but I still have days where I, for seemingly no reason, experience anxiety. And I just have to love myself through the anxiety. I have to love myself with anxiety. And yes, take the salt baths. You’re an essential oil lover. Sometimes that is the quickest, easiest solution. Just take a big huff out of the bottle, inhale through your nose. Take a deep breath that’s mindful. And it’s amazing how even those, the chemical constituents of essential oil can alter your thoughts and emotions in a matter of seconds. So, that’s another thing I love to do as well.

Robyn: Every time I teach a class, there’s always someone, when I ask somebody what is a pain point that they’re currently problem-solving for? Which also happens to be one of my favorite podcast questions. But, it’s usually like high anxiety, high stress. And I’m, I got you. It’s absolutely ridiculous when it’s, I have an oil for that statement comes out of my mouth.

Sarah: There’s an “I have an oil for that” for everything.

Robyn: Yes. And my first experience with using oils, to just take me out of my thought patterns. Because it’s my thought patterns. And I recognize that I’m telling a story, I’m creating a massive problem in my head. And just by simply stopping and opening a bottle of oil, filling the diffuser with water, putting frankincense and vetiver in together, and then mindfully, doing something else. So, I will write thank you cards to my podcast guests, or journal. But it’s immediately just taking myself out of what I was doing. And being mindful toward something productive, and something positive.

Sarah: Yes. And the power of your thoughts and your beliefs. Oh my gosh. It’s so powerful. And to just be cognizant and aware of that, allows you to start to shift and rewire your thoughts and brain, so that you may start to experience less anxiety.

Nourishing myself through food, meditation, and nature

Robyn: So, as you take care of yourself through the day, you mentioned that you, and I don’t know how close to the AIP protocol you follow now, but how do you nourish yourself now?

Sarah: So, I no longer follow the AIP diet. I’ve changed. I work with a functional diagnostic nutritionist, who I love. And he has helped me shift my diet to one that is very specific to my lab results. And what my body needs, versus doesn’t need. And so, when I am nourishing myself throughout the day, I am following that very specific individual diet of my own. But looking for always nutrient-dense foods. Something I learned and didn’t know in the beginning when I was diagnosed with autoimmune disease is that the immune system is a nutrient hog. It requires the most micronutrients of any other system in your body. And so, it’s so important to get those nutrients. And sometimes there are days where I didn’t eat enough, or I’m not going to get enough nutrients through these three meals. And so, that’s where I supplement a little bit.

I do my green juice. I do my bone broth, I do the different powders that I’m putting in all my shakes, I make an avocado mousse, that’s my sweet treat. Because I don’t eat sugar either, because it gives me panic attacks. It is something I learned through intuitively testing. Trying to figure out what is triggering these panic attacks. Sugar was one of those things. So, I’m looking for nutrient-dense foods, but I think nourishment is beyond just-food. So, I’m eating pretty intuitively checking in with my body. What do I crave? What I desire, what do I know is going to make me feel like crap, versus what it’s going to make me feel good? And then, I nourish myself through meditation. And that’s another one of those practices when I am stepping back. I have several different apps on my phone, plus YouTube is an amazing free resource. There’re millions of meditations there. And I meditate. And I close my eyes, and sometimes it’s not super silent in my thoughts. That’s okay. Sometimes I can get quiet, and sometimes I can’t, and I just honor it. I also love to take breaks. And especially, when it’s small. Most of the time it’s sunny out here in Colorado, but if it’s warm enough, I’ll take my dog for a walk outside. And just taking that deep, fresh breath of air can, again, just like an essential oil, be this thing that completely shifts your mindset so instantly. Yes. So, I nourished myself through food, meditation, and nature. I am someone who I started to go a little crazy if I don’t get any time in nature. And it is part of the reason that we moved to Colorado, from previously living in Chicago and Detroit, in these bustling cities that are super fun. But weren’t aligned with the life I wanted anymore. And so now, we live a 10-minute drive to fresh air and mountains and snow-boarding and all these things that really bring me joy.

Robyn: I love that. And, I love that every single one of my guests knows, that the nourish question is not just about food. Although, I love to see how people actually fuel their bodies. And also, all of my guests get so energized from being in nature. I think I would stare blankly at someone if they told me, no, I don’t like going outside. I’d be like, huh? Shoot, come again? And yes, when I moved from Toronto to Ottawa, I was, I’m going to miss my community. I’m going to miss my tribe. And I kept saying, I’m really excited that I can drive to Gatineau Park within 30 minutes. Versus a two-hour drive to get to a trail, to go trail running in Toronto. And, I didn’t realize how much my body needed that. Needed to be able to just go stand in the backyard, while, my dogs run around. And just breathe in air, that’s not crazy polluted.

Sarah: It makes a huge difference. I’ve had friends come out. So, it’s funny, because we’re talking about the energy you put out is what you attract. And, I’ve actually attracted all my best friends have autoimmune disease. Some of them have come to visit me out in Colorado since I’m definitely a Midwest girl at heart. And it’s freaking amazing. They come out here and they are like, oh my god, I feel better. And I’m, it’s the fresh air. It’s nature. We need to earth; we need to ground. And now, we’re even seeing research and studies on the power, and the effect, that just sticking your toes in the dirt actually has on your body. And how freaking cool is that?

Robyn: I also I just posted this on Instagram this morning, which is fascinating, but we talk about what we do to serve ourselves well. And, the quote was, “Become more aware of what’s really worth your energy”. And so many people with autoimmune, have the spoonies theory. And I don’t understand it, because I don’t deal with the exhaustion, and fatigue that many autoimmune diseases have. But when I have had days like that, I’m, Oh, now I get it. When you have one spoon, to do one task, work with energy, you go, okay, what is really worth my energy? And for those that don’t have any symptoms, it’s still the same kind of thought process. You have limited free time throughout the day, based on where your work priorities are. If you’re in a full-time job, or even if you’re building your own business. And it’s, what am I going to spend that on? Am I going to take care of myself with healthy habits? Or am I going to do things that may drain me at the end of the day? So, if you have potentially put in a long day, you’ve got a launch coming up, or you’re in your masculine energy, and you’ve realized you’ve been typing at your computer all day. What are some habits other than the Epsom salt bath, that you do to reduce any stress that may have built up?

Sarah: So, nature, salt bath, meditate are some of my top three, that I’ve already mentioned. But I also love to just, it depends on the actual energy level that day. But I’m just feeling like stressed, but not completely drained, I’ll dance. And I am okay, Robin, I am not a good dancer. But I turn on my music and I close the door, because my boyfriend’s home. He sleeps during the day, because he works the night shift. But I get my privacy, and I will just dance. And it’s, for me, it’s just this expression of letting go of stress. And it’s not like I’m doing it for an hour. It doesn’t feel like a workout. It’s just this short, solo dance party. Usually to Miley Cyrus or something silly. And it just helps me get at… We take ourselves so freaking seriously. Sometimes, I take life way too seriously. And I just have to remind myself to tap into my inner child, and dance, and play, and sing. And again, I’m not a good singer either, but I do it. And sometimes it’s playful, like Miley Cyrus. Other times I listened to more Sanskrit types chanting music, that is also super powerful, to stimulate your vagus nerve, and turn off that fight or flight that we talked about earlier. So, I try to tap into my inner child. If I am low energy, and dancing just does not sound like something I need or want to do at that moment. I also love emotional freedom technique, which is…

Robyn: Tapping.

Sarah: Yes. And that’s a powerful practice that can help you. I love it when people emphasize that it’s okay to have a negative thought. It’s okay to feel stressed. It’s okay to feel angry, and frustrated, and pissed off. And, as an alpha female type a personality, when I was younger, I thought it was not okay. I was not allowed to be sad or mad. And, I had to keep the peace all the time. And that’s totally out the window in my life now. I realized how powerful it is to actually express your true emotions, and how potentially harmful it is to not. And to hold all that crap inside for so long. So, tapping is a practice that allows you to get, again, I feel that this is real and raw, and authentic. I like to be real with my emotions, and not be so hard on myself, or feeling stressed, or feeling frustrated about something. No matter how big or little. And use the tapping practice to bring that in, feel it in my body. Where does it manifest in my body? And then start to let it go. There’s a difference between feeling the emotion, and then harboring it, storing it somewhere in your body. Versus feeling it, honoring it, saying okay, yes, you’re real, you’re here, I feel you. Now, it’s time for you to go, because I am going to keep being my alpha female self and getting shit done. So, I love the tapping practice to honor the whole rainbow of emotions. And I often include my essential oils in that practice. Just a way to kind of up level and take it to a higher intensity as well.

Robyn: I subconsciously started believing, because my parents are really good at comforting me when I would start feeling sadness or anger. And so, I subconsciously believed that I needed to stop it as fast as possible, because yeah. And so, I developed over the years, I’m too strong to cry, there’s no need to cry. I’m stronger than this. I can get through this. I don’t need to show that emotion. And, when I did tapping for the first time, I was, okay, this is a negative thought. It’s not serving me, but I believe it to be true. And when you tap and you say that negative thought over, and over, and over again, you hit that point where you’re, Oh, this isn’t true. Oh, I get it. It’s not serving me. It’s not true. I can get rid of it now. I can shift to the positive thought that I wanted to think, at the beginning. But sometimes it’s when people talk about mindset shifting and having a different perspective, it’s really hard to flip a switch. And tapping is the long switch. That is how I shift thoughts when I’m just, okay, I should be okay, this isn’t true, but I keep thinking it over and over again. So, I love that. And, it’s one of those ones where, have you ever done it in public?

Sarah: I am completely guilty of being at a restaurant, going into the women’s room, shutting the door and tapping, sitting on the toilet.

Robyn: I’m the same, because I was even in my home office, and I was tapping, and my fiancé walked in and he’s, what are you doing? I’m, ah, can you close the door, please. And, he’s, no, seriously, what are you doing? I was, tapping. It’s going to take me too long to explain this. Just close the door.

Sarah: I’ll tell you about it later. Maybe.

Why we consciously stopped using the word ‘woo’

Robyn: This is funny because I think that’s why I used the term, ‘woo’. We were having this conversation, and he’s, so you’re woo friends. And I’m, excuse me. He’s, well, that’s the term you use, so I’m using it. I’m like, true. I overuse it, I think. And it’s just an easy bucket to put all the things that sometimes, have no scientific. Or they do have a scientific basis, but you have to search really far down, and then explain it to people. So, it’s just the easy terminology that we’re using these days. But it does, it put things, it puts things in a bucket that are, Oh yeah, that’s a little hippie. I guess it’s like what hippie used to be several years ago.

Sarah: Yes. I totally resonate with that. And used to use ‘woo’ and describe myself as ‘woo, woo’ and some of the things that I was teaching. And then I have consciously stopped. I really try not to anymore, because I was, okay, what message am I putting out into the world? Are people going to want to hire me, and work with me, if I’m calling something that I put out there, woo? And you’re right. There’s not really a better word for it right now, because there are definitely alternative. But again, just because it’s alternative, or not what you hear at your doctor’s office, and not mainstream, doesn’t mean it doesn’t work. And for me, those, what would fit into the umbrella of woo, have been the most powerful things for me in my healing. And so, I keep trying to shift the language, and to, just speak about whatever the tool is, in just real practical terms, versus the woo bucket. Because although I love the woo, I want more people to start to open up their minds to it, and the possibilities that it could create for them.

Robyn: So, I hear by pronounce, I will not use the word, ‘woo’ after this podcast.

Sarah: Yeah!

Robyn: I will. I’ve said it out loud. I’m an upholder or an obliger. So now, the fact that I have said it out loud, the entire podcast audience can now keep me accountable. So, once this podcast episode airs, and if I ever say it again on Instagram stories, you can call me out.

Sarah: Call you out. No more woo.

Robyn: What piece of advice would you tell your 20-year-old emerging alpha female self?

Sarah: Oh, my goodness. So much, honestly, I wish I could go, just do a workshop for 20-year-olds now. But I think the theme of that workshop would be that she has enough. She is pretty enough. She is smart enough. She is capable enough. She is allowed to break the rules. Oh my God. I was such a, what is that, the upholder or obliger that sticks to all the rules?

Robyn: I think it is obliger. You have to please everybody around you. Yes.

Sarah: It still freaks me out to break the rules a little bit. But I would tell her that she’s allowed to break the rules and do things in her own way, and indifferent. I’m all about fricking unicorns. I want to embody a unicorn because I want people to see that it is okay to be weird, and different, and unique. And you are still lovable. You are still smart. And I think that’s the message or lesson, that my brother also taught me. Because, he totally just embraced his weirdness, and embraced his, him who he was, as Jordan, in his entire spirit and body. And the way that he spoke and danced. That’s part of why I love to dance too, is because he was just free when he was dancing. And I saw that in him, and I was, Oh my gosh, that is so not me. I would never just dance and look so silly, but he did it all the time. And now that he’s gone, I looked back, and that was so special. And it was so beautiful to see someone in their authenticity, not giving an F about what other people think. And 20-year-old Sarah worried way too much about what other people thought. So, give her a little breakdown workshop on all the things that she is good at, and enough, and capable of, which has emerged for me, now that I’m 30 years old now. So that’s 10 years ago. And a lot has changed and shifted, but I definitely think that I could have used a pep talk at 20.

Robyn: And I do love that you dance. One of my past guests, just recently, Katie Wilkin, describes herself as a feminine energy activator. And I told her that, as I’ve been on an emotional blueprint, a healing journey. One of the things that my reflexologist said when she touched my feet, she’s like your warrior woman’s side is really, really strong, but you have no feminine energy. I was, really? Well, let me tell you about my brand, Alpha Female. And, she’s, do you even know what feminine energy looks like? And I’m, nope. All I’m picturing is flowy dresses in a field.

Sarah: Flowers.

Robyn: And I was telling Katie about this. And she shared on the podcast that, lone of the ways that she activates her feminine energy is she just dances before she gets on a Facebook Live. Or dances before she gets on a team call. She’s also with doTERRA. And there’s a beautiful high-level leader brand, the [Hovi?] that has this meditation. I think it’s called yes your rank, and she gets you to dance for three minutes before you sit in meditation. And I could feel the cells in my body just buzzing. I’m, Oh gosh, there is something to this dance thing. And, I should ask Mike, my fiancé, I was on a team call, and we all decided to dance to Bieber, before getting serious. And he snuck into my home office and filmed it.

Sarah: Oh my god.

Robyn: So, I need to ask him for that, because that’s when, there’s so many times when you know no one’s watching, and you are your complete, authentic self.

Sarah: Yes. You need to watch that video, and to see how beautiful you are. And what you look like when you think no one’s watching. You’re stuck in there. But yes, when you, how you express yourself. And I did a five days of dancing, little Instagram story challenge. Where I just went and I did my silly dance for five days straight. And part of it was, for me to hold myself accountable. But part of it was just to inspire other people to see, look, you can do this. Close the door, and you’re going to slowly get more comfortable. But just start, just start, start now, start today. Start with your body shaking, start with your voice trembling, but start. Start and don’t stop.

Robyn: So what’s a pain point that you’re currently problem-solving for, around being an alpha female?

Sarah: I think a lot of it is the anxiety that I mentioned before. It’s definitely a challenge in my life. And so, that’s the pain point. But what I’m trying to do is to remember to slow down. I get super, freaking, passionate about what I do, because I know I’m on my path. And I feel I’ve finally found this thing that lights me up inside. And so, while there is joy and happiness in my work, and sitting at my computer. I actually find that to be very fun, some days. I do have to remind myself to stop. And, I think that also, as I’ve grown my brand and stepped into my confidence, I’ve had to break through these barriers of, I used to try and get small around people. And I would get small, I would cower down, back away, because I didn’t want to out shine anyone. And I was afraid, and there was so much fear. I think fear is definitely another one of those pain points. And I would cower back. I would worry about what people are thinking, because I know I’m powerful. I know I have light, and then, I would try to hide it. And now, I feel, I’m okay, be yourself, Sarah. Go out, freaking sparkle, and let other people think what they want to think. And so, I learned through actually this whole business creation, oh my gosh, starting your own business is the most intense self-development journey. But I learned to just never let what other people think, dictate my future. And to just be me. Be authentic, be real, be my unicorn sparkly self.

Robyn: I love that. So, to add on to it, because the end question, and I feel like you’re already getting there. So, let’s just throw it into one.

Sarah: There. Let’s do it.

My definition of happiness

Robyn: What is your definition of happiness? How would you wrap that up?

Sarah: Well, I wrote you one thing, in an email. I think maybe I’ll change it a little bit. I wrote you, “Happiness is waking up every day and feeling excited, and energized, about the unlimited possibilities that lie ahead of you.” I also think, “Happiness is feeling secure, confident, grounded enough to be yourself.” And when you can be yourself and you stop putting up all these facades and overthinking what other people think. Or how they interpret what you’ve said, you can be happier, because you can just give less F’s.

Robyn: I love that. That’s a perfect way to wrap it up. Thank you so much for how you show up in this world. How you are healing the world and taking time for us today.

Sarah: Thank you so much, Robyn. It’s been a pleasure talking to you.

Thank you so much for tuning into today’s episode, tribe. There’s one more thing I want to tell you about today. I just launched my brand-new one-on-one business coaching program. It’s for women who are current or aspiring health and wellness coaches who want to stand the F out, in this ginormous wellness world. And it’s called the Unicorn Healer Intensive. I want to help you take the knowledge that you’ve gleaned from your personal healing journey, and not only share it with the world but also monetize it online. In the past year and a half of running my online business, Autoimmune Tribe. I’ve not only grown my audience to a combined following of more than 16,000 people, but I’ve created my dream life. One where I can work from anywhere, be my own boss, and empower others to go from, it’s hard to be human, to soul on a mission. If you’ve been dying to start your own business, or maybe you have an Instagram account, and you’re sharing pictures of your recipes, but getting crickets on your posts, then, I want to help you. You deserve a life of abundance, that I know you have a light to share it with this world. So, click the link in the show notes to schedule your one-hour consultation, and learn more about this four-month intensive. Thank you again for listening and I’ll see you next time.

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